To the Single Mom...

It's been a while since I've written, but today I felt compelled to write a note to the Single Moms out there.  With Mother's Day behind us, I want to encourage you ladies.  I know Mother's Day can be difficult for all sorts of different reasons, but this is one that is near and dear to my heart.  You see, I was a single mom for 5 years before Adam and I got married.  Those years were some of the hardest of my life, but I truly believe God shaped me during that time in ways I didn't know were possible.

I want you to know that I see you, and I understand how you feel.  I know what it's like to struggle to make ends meet.  To feel like you're always the bad guy.  To wonder if you're messing it all up.  Trust that Jesus sees you, and he knew you could do this job, that's why he gave it to you.  He could've chosen anyone for this assignment, but he picked you. 

 

When the days are long and there's no one there to help, Jesus has a plan for you.  When there are more bills than money, Jesus is there.  When your baby does something amazing and you want to share it with someone, tell Jesus, he's listening!

 

Don't give up because that sweet child is counting on you, and believe it or not, they think you are amazing.  Because you are.

 

I wish I could promise you that your story will turn out like mine and a wonderful man will come along and pursue your heart and treat your child as if she were his own, but I can't.  What I can promise you, is that Jesus loves you and he only gives good gifts to his children.  He has good in store for you Mama!  He love you Mama!  So snuggle that babe a little tighter tonight and know that someone knows where you are, and is standing on the other side cheering you on.  You can do it Mama!

Blogger Fail

At some point during 2012 I realized I missed blogging.  I missed the look back it gives, and the perspective.  I miss knowing my girls will have the chance to read it one day and smile (or have any myriad of facial expressions) when they think back on things we've shared.  As a result, I started blogging again.

I did really well for a while.

Ok, fine.  I did ok for a while. In total I managed to eek out 25 posts for the year.  Considering I didn't start until August that's not too bad, right?

Then December rolled around, and well, things got a little crazy.  We experienced our first Christmas rush with our business. We announced we were pregnant.  And we started packing our apartment for the upcoming move.  Add in the ridiculous morning all day sickness I was facing and blogging fell to the end of the line.  Even if I had time, I just didn't feel like it.

When we rang in the new year I made myself promise I would do better.  FAIL!  I managed to post twice in January and once in July.  I had big dreams of capturing our new home, my pregnancy, and I'm sure some other number of things I was going to accomplish.  While those things were potentially accomplished, I was too busy doing them to write about them.

On one hand, I am thankful that I was busy living my life and not just writing about it, but I want to find a balance here as well.

We are now halfway through the first month of 2014 and I'm going to try again.  After all, I can't change 2013, but I can make my mark on 2014 as it has yet to be written.

With that in mind, my goal for this year is to post on a weekly(ish) basis and to have a mix of family moments, recipes, and business updates along the way.  Hopefully I won't be writing this same post a year from now. :)

Time Flies!

Honestly, where does it go?  I hopped over to my blog today to look back at a couple of things and couldn't believe how long it has been since I've written.  Sad, just sad.  So much has changed since the last time I was on here...for starters, I am staring down my due date!  Literally, it is 3 weeks from tomorrow and I can't wait for our sweet baby to be here.

We've chosen to be surprised with the gender of our child, so anticipation is just about to drive us all wild!  But either way, in just a few weeks we will have a new sweet bundle of joy and will all be acclimating to life with a baby.  Here are a few of our favorite pictures from our recent maternity session with our good friend Stefanie.  She and her husband own SBChilds Photography, and have done an incredible job of capturing this exciting time for us.  I can't wait for them to do our newborn pictures in just a few weeks!

Hmm...seems like I had a few other things to share, but they escape me at the moment.  Some on purpose as I'm not quite ready to share, and others because well, I'm pregnant and my mind doesn't hold things long!  Happy 4th of July all!

1000 words

I wanted to do a quick post to share these pictures of Alexa.  Mainly because I can't believe how grown up she seems.  Goodness, where did my chubby cheeked, pudgy belly, roly-poly thighs girl go?  It doesn't make ANY sense, but here we are with a sophisticated, well dressed, beautiful girl on our hands.  I am so proud of who she is becoming and I wouldn't trade her for the world.  Just look at that sweet smile, I have a feeling we are headed for trouble when she is old enough to date...a VERY LONG TIME from now!  

Just one small comment on the straight hair.  First, Alexa prefers her hair straight, and for a long time I have refused to comply with her requests for straight hair...her step-mom Lori has straightened it on occasion as did a friend of ours, but I have held my ground.  Then when she came home from her friend's house on Sunday with straight hair I promised if she got up early Monday I would straighten it for her so she could wear it to school that way.  Second, her hair is SOOO curly that each of these pictures are taken moments after I straightened it, and should you see her any more than 15 minutes later you would understand what I'm talking about, so it requires us to re-straighten it each and every morning.  On Monday I made sure she knew that I wasn't going to do this on a daily basis, but her hair is much less messy when it is straight, so we've been 5 days with straight hair now with no signs of stopping.  Fine that's more than one small comment, but just thought I'd throw it in for good measure.  I do love her curly hair, but it is a beast to deal with, so for now, straight it is.

Cows & Pumpkins

Between our budget and eating better I have made a discovery.  Eating clean, whole, organic food can get rather expensive.  Especially if you make the leap to the high end products like meat and cheese.  I don't have too much trouble finding produce at a decent price, but paying $6.50 a pound for ground beef is a little more than our budget and my stomach can handle.  As a result I've started looking for other options for buying such items.  I am sad to admit I haven't found a fabulous source yet, but in my search this week we did find some other neat things!

Tuesday I got off work early after an all day staff retreat, so we drove to a farm a few miles from our house. When we got to the store we found out they were in the middle of milking.  Alexa was so excited to see the cows in action!  Granted, she did think it was pretty smelly.  Interestingly enough, I remember going to the dairy when I was little, so it is rather comforting to me.  We grabbed some raw milk and some cheese when milking was over and headed home.

The cow pictured was not fond of the experience...she kicked the suction cups off of her and busted out of the milking parlor...according to the farmer, she doesn't like people.  Oops!

Today we visited 2 other farms on the East side of the city.  Tuttles is an apple orchard and pumpkin patch, and as you can see there were plenty to choose from!  I was a bit sad this year that we didn't get to go to Nivens, we've been every year since 2007, but it is a bit of a drive these days.  I was more than excited when Deborah mentioned Tuttles.  We also went to the Apple Family Farm, but we didn't get any pictures there.  I'm toying with the idea of buying a cow share from them...we'll see how that goes.

Alexa trying to decide on the perfect pumpkin for her

The whole fam

Alexa and Annabeth seeing how they measure up.  

All in all our week made me realize how much more I want to live on a farm.  I love the idea of our kids growing up in a more natural environment & learning to live off the land.  I'm not sure how long it will be before we get there, but someday it will happen!  Goodness, never thought I'd say something like that!

Keep it simple

With the busyness of life these days it has become increasingly important to Adam and me that our life become as simple as possible.  This isn't always possible as we are involved in so many different things.  Take yesterday for example, Alexa's school sent home a paper for the PTO meeting that was LAST NIGHT!  I actually found out the night before when an automated call came through, and later also received an email.  Who gives 1 day notice for that type of thing?  This morning when she brought the note from school to me she informed me the class with the highest attendance got an ice cream party.  Great, now I feel guilty for not going.  Do you think if I buy her ice cream it will make it all better?  Fat chance!

A simple life.  Sounds lovely to me.  And so simple.  But if you walked into Alexa's room right now, you would see anything but simple!  Her room is not very large, and her furniture takes up a good portion...but on top of that, she has more toys, books, and papers (I'm raising a pack rat, she wants to keep every scrap she cuts and every piece of something she finds) than one child house should be allowed.  And the stuffed animals OH MY!  I swear they take over her bed at night and I'm honestly not sure how she sleeps with them beside, behind, under, and on top of her!

It seems like every year around her birthday and Christmas we clean out and give away, and yet with each event it seems the pile has grown to even greater proportions.  After reading some different blogs we decided this year would be different.  For Christmas she will receive 4 gifts from us, and they will fall into the following categories:

1. Something she wants
2. Something she needs
3. Something she wears
4. Something she reads

Obviously it is easy for us to control what happens at our house, but that's not the only place she receives gifts, and let's be honest, as her mom I don't want to give her practical gifts and gifts of necessity while everyone else gets to give her fun stuff.  So, I decided to write a letter to our family and ask them to partner with us on this venture.  After all, there is so much more to Christmas than presents.  Now that we are 9 hours away we cherish the time we spend in SC more than ever and see that time as a gift.  And of course without the gift of Jesus we wouldn't have anything to celebrate.  I am so thankful my Savior came to earth all those years ago knowing he would die on a cross for my sins.

You might notice in the letter I only listed 3 options instead of 4...this was by design!  The whole point is to cut down on the number of toys she receives.  If I gave the fun option to everyone, they would choose fun, and once again I would be stuck with practical and necessary.  NO THANK YOU!  I accept that this is probably an flaw on my part, and that I should probably work on it, but if the whole point of this exercise is to help control what she receives I have to limit it in some form...admitting you have a problem is the first step, right?

I would love to hear your thoughts on our letter.  It will be interesting to see how this first year goes, but our plan is to continue this for the years ahead.  That doesn't mean there will never be an exception, but certainly at this point in our journey this is the best way.  Are you looking for simplicity in your life?  What have you found that works for your family?  Please come and share with us!

The BEST is yet to come!

It is hard for me to believe that this time last year I was waiting to marry the man of my dreams.  Nervous about timing, rain, and everything else a bride can think of, and excited out of my mind that the day we dreamed about and planned for was finally here.  On one hand it doesn't seem like it's possible that an entire year has passed, and on the other so much has changed it seems our wedding is a distant memory.

I can honestly say that day was a dream come true for me.  Every girl dreams of that day for so long, and at times not only do we put more effort into the wedding than the marriage, but I also think we can put it on a pedestal so high our greatest efforts to reach it fall short.  That was not the case for us.  I think back on that day often, and thank Jesus for bringing this wonderful man into my life and Alexa's life.  I couldn't have asked for more.  I see Ephesians 3:20 come to life more and more each day in our marriage, and the words in my head do not come close to doing justice to how I feel.

This year has brought some crazy changes our way, and what seemed like huge leaps of faith at the time.  No doubt onlookers still see them that way, but when they become every day life it goes from crossing a canyon to stepping stones.  I have joked that with a step of faith as large as moving 500 miles from our home and family, nowhere to live, and no jobs, I could only imagine what our next step of faith would look like! God is so gracious to provide for us each day, and I pray we never take it for granted.

I am looking forward to the leaps or steps the future holds, and pray Jesus will prepare the way each day so we will know the way when we happen upon them.  I've been told the first year of marriage is the hardest, and if that is true all I can say is the best is yet to come!

To my dear sweet husband, I love you so much and there is no one else I would want to walk this journey with.  Thank you for standing by my side every day, even when I'm irrational, crazy, and make dumb decisions.  Thank you for leading our family each and every day toward the next step God has planned for us.  Thank you for working diligently to reach our goals.  Thank you for loving me and our daughter.  It means more to me than you'll ever know.  If we've come this far in a year, I can't wait to see what the next year holds for us!

I forgot

I started writing this blog in 2007 just prior to Alexa's first birthday, and in 2009 just a few weeks after she turned 3 I called it quits.  I recently came back, for a number of reasons, but now that I'm back it has me wondering why I left in the first place, and why I ever started.  This week I went back and read some of the blogs I posted between 2007 and 2009.  And now I remember.

If you met Alexa today you would probably take her for an independent, extremely smart, and sassy 6 year old who loves being girly, kindergarten, and asking as many questions as she can possibly think of at one time.  I want to remember that.  When I have other children and can't keep them straight, I want to be able to look back at my blog and recall funny times we shared.  When I'm a grandmother who loves stuffing her grandchildren full of candy and spoiling them rotten prior to sending them home, I want to be able to tell them stories about their parents.  I remember every time she did something funny thinking 'I'll always remember that', but the truth is, I can't.  So that's part of why I write.

If you didn't know her then, I highly recommend taking a trip down memory lane with me, not because I'm a fabulous writer, but because my child is hysterical!  If nothing else, I will keep this up for the memories.

Another Year

At this time 6 years ago I was laying in a hospital bed, completely worn out from the days activities, holding my dear, sweet, 7lb 1oz baby girl in my arms.  I have never been so amazed, exhausted, and thankful as I was that day.  Here we are 6 years later and that thankfulness does not stop.  Alexa is truly a blessing in our lives, and although she is sassy, independent, and too much like me at times, I love her more than words could even describe.  I thank Jesus for her daily, and pray I allow him to teach me to be a better mother.  Happy birthday Alexa Lynn, mommy & daddy love you so much!

just minutes old

1st taste of cake

2 years old

she tried to eat the fondant princess on her cake

How a year changes things!

She still loves to put icing all over her face & not eat the cake

My birthday princess with her Barbie cake

Busy...

In each season of our life, I have thought "how busy are we?" and "when will this slow down"...and for some reason I believe it when I tell myself "the next season won't be this bad...".  YEAH RIGHT!  Adam and I are staring down our 1 year wedding anniversary and all I can say is man, we're still busy.  Last year at this time, I was planning a wedding, being a single mom, working full time, and going to school full time.  That's definitely a busy season.  Now, I'm married, with a kindergartner, still working full time, and helping plant a church.  Yep, still busy.  Does your life feel this way too?  What do you do to keep a grasp on things during these busy times?

While this season (and every season) is busy in it's own right, I am thankful for the journey we are on.  I'm still full swing in baking, and have some new recipes I want to try.  Maybe I'll get around to that later today, and maybe I won't.  Either way, stay tuned for an update.  And don't forget to take time to stop and consider the beauty of God's creation around you each day in your busyness!

Thankful

Over the past week our life has been anything but normal.  We got a call last Friday that Adam's stepdad had been hospitalized.  We weren't sure how serious it was until Saturday morning when he was moved to ICU.  Being 8 hours away makes this type of situation that much harder.  We jumped in the car and raced (as quickly as possible without getting pulled over) to his mother's side.  Adam spent the next 72 hours at the hospital, and during that time we made the decision that Alexa and I would return to Indianapolis on Monday.

I was a single mom for about 4 years before Adam and I got married and I recall those times being difficult at best.  When things were bad there was no back-up, and when things were good there was no one to stand back and share it with.  I can't begin to explain how thankful I am that 2.5 years ago Adam made the decision to pursue me.

That brings us back to the present...I have been away from my husband for 6 days now and I miss him terribly.  I don't sleep as well when he isn't here and while I love spending time with Alexa, it just isn't the same without him.  He definitely made our family complete.

I want to thank the mothers who do this every day; single moms, moms with traveling husbands, and most importantly military moms.  There is a finite amount of time that I will be without Adam and this time it is 10 days, we will be reunited in SC on Wednesday.  For some military wives they spend months at a time away from their husband, and life carries on at home in his absence.  They don't know for sure when he will be home, and sometimes he never comes home.  I can't begin to imagine what that feels like, and I pray I never will.  To all the wives and mothers who sacrifice on a daily basis, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, thank you!